Please grab a cup of tea and join me for my daily tale of how I've been in recovery for over a year now, finally!!
A lot has become much clearer over the past year with my recovery. I finally understand what it means to recover myself. I've been lost. Didn't really know myself as I had been molded by other people. Told what to do, when to do it and how to do it.
Funnily, I've been on my spiritual journey for many years. I stumbled upon dearly departed Wayne Dyer's books in the early 1990's. He became my mentor along with the very popular Eckhart Tolle. In the meantime, I was completely immersing myself in wine.
Instead of recovering myself, I dosed myself to numb out how I was feeling. We are the baby boomers and grew up in the 1950's and 60's. Canadian families were able to enjoy abundant lifestyles and this meant, a lot of alcohol in some cases, such as mine. We didn't talk about feelings. Parents motto was "children should be seen and not heard." We towed the line but had very little supervision and lived a feral childhood. Dad was a logger and gone most of the time, leaving poor Mom with three, quite rambunctious daughters. This was during time when stay at home mothers had what they called " mothers' little helpers" or in other words, speed!
I started drinking about 12 years old and believe I became an alcoholic in high school. The teaching staff deemed me as "university material" but I didn't have a mentor and very little family support, so I really struggled. As well, I spent all my free time either working at my part-time job or drinking. Studies took a back seat.
I'll be back with more stories of how I've finally started to recover myself. xxx Cath
